My Spouse Has Been Charged With Domestic Violence And I Want A Divorce

November 6, 2023

Closeup,Of,Aggressive,Man,Hand,Grabbed,Woman,ShoulderFinding oneself in a situation where a spouse has been charged with domestic violence is not only emotionally devastating but also raises crucial questions about safety, trust, and the viability of the marriage. This blog post aims to shed light on the complex decision-making process and personal journey involved in seeking divorce after such charges have been levied against a spouse. It is essential to emphasize that domestic violence is a serious offense, and seeking legal assistance and support is imperative in these circumstances.

Understanding the Reality:

When facing the shock of domestic violence charges against a spouse, it is crucial to recognize the gravity of the situation. Domestic violence is a criminal act that can severely impact the physical, emotional, and psychological well-being of the victim. As the victim in this scenario, prioritizing one’s own safety and seeking appropriate legal action becomes the focal point.

Assessing Personal Safety:

The first step after discovering domestic violence charges against a spouse is to ensure personal safety. Victims of domestic violence are at risk of further harm, and it is essential to consult a professional, such as a therapist or counselor, who specializes in domestic violence. Their expertise will help assess the level of danger and develop a personalized safety plan, be it restraining orders, seeking shelter, or other protective measures.

Seeking Legal Assistance:

To navigate the complexities of divorce proceedings following domestic violence charges, it is vital to engage a reliable attorney who specializes in family law and domestic violence cases. An attorney will guide the victim through the legal process, provide advice on restraining orders, custody arrangements, and property division, ensuring that the victim’s rights are protected in court.

Seeking Support:

During this profoundly challenging time, support from friends, family, or support groups can provide much-needed emotional strength. Engaging with others who have experienced similar situations can foster a sense of solidarity and validate the victim’s feelings and decisions. Professional counseling and therapy can also offer a safe space to process emotions, heal, and rebuild a sense of self.

Rebuilding Trust and Self-Esteem:

Victims of domestic violence often experience a profound erosion of trust and self-esteem. Rebuilding these aspects of one’s life requires intentional efforts. Engaging in self-care, practicing mindfulness, and seeking therapy are crucial steps towards healing from the emotional wounds inflicted by domestic violence. Empowering oneself by setting boundaries and reestablishing personal autonomy plays a pivotal role in rebuilding trust and self-esteem.

The Impact on Children:

When children are involved, their well-being becomes an additional concern in the decision to divorce after domestic violence charges. Seeking professional counseling for children can provide them with a safe environment to process their emotions and ensure they feel supported. Co-parenting arrangements should prioritize the safety and emotional stability of the children. Child custody evaluations and legal support are essential to establish a stable and secure environment for their growth.

Legal Protection:

Alongside pursuing a divorce, obtaining legal protection through restraining orders or protection orders becomes paramount to ensure the victim’s ongoing safety. The legal system offers several avenues to secure physical protection and create boundaries to prevent further instances of domestic violence during and after divorce proceedings. Consulting with an attorney will help victims understand their rights and the available legal remedies.

The Emotional Rollercoaster:

Coming to terms with the reality of domestic violence charges against a spouse is an emotional rollercoaster. Feelings of guilt, shame, anger, and grief will undoubtedly emerge throughout the divorce process. Seeking emotional support from therapists, counseling, or support groups can help manage these emotions. It is important to remember that healing takes time and that it is okay to seek professional help to navigate the complex emotional landscape.


Facing divorce after discovering that a spouse has been charged with domestic violence is an agonizing experience that necessitates carefully planned decisions and professional support systems. Prioritizing personal safety, seeking legal guidance, and surrounding oneself with supportive networks are critical steps towards finding healing, rebuilding trust, and moving forward after such traumatic events. Remember, as a victim, you hold the strength and resilience needed to overcome this adversity and embark on a new chapter of life that prioritizes your well-being and happiness.

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